it is i writing on the internet to let humans know that today is 'Pollo's day of birth-giving.
it has been approximately one million and five hundred and seventy six thousand and eight hundred minutes since this earth has been blessed with my beautiful and fluffy presence.
you are very welcome.
and still in all of this time my humans (the tall one and the chocolate one) have not yet learned to give me enough food. pfft.
but today they have given me a fish cake and tried to make me wear stupid hat. i am nobodies show kitty. my humans are also saying today is special because it marks five years of them being a couple of humans instead of one human and one human. i did give them congratulatory mew but today is my day and they will not steal my fish. i mean thunder.
anyway. wish me happy birthday please and i will make sure to take note of those who do. i will give you extra fish when my fellow kitties take over this planet. i mean... meow.
'Pollo is over and out. i see chocolate human is opening the white door of wonder which is holding all of the fish. i mean food. meow.
oh and remember you is amazing and all of that. but not as amazing as me. meow.